Mark and the Big Bad Bird by Mark Lyons Image by gabicuz from Pixabay “If I put on my gray hoodie, put up the hood, duck down real low, and run as fast as I can, I think I can make it to the mailbox,” whispers Mark as he peers cautiously through the peephole in his front door. He backs away from the peephole and makes a few notations on a yellow legal pad. After a few more minutes of contemplation, Mark adds more to his original assessment. “If I throw in some zig-zags and flail my arms over my head, that should be enough to keep me safe.” “Honey, what are...
Measure Once, Cut Twice? by Mark Lyons Image by Pezibear from Pixabay “Measure twice, cut once?” mutters Mark under his breath. “Wait, or is it measure once, cut twice? Maybe it’s give up and hire a deck installer who knows what they are doing?” Mark stands back and stares at the bare ground next to his above ground swimming pool where he wants to build a 10’ x 10’ deck. The deck is to serve as a platform on which to enter and exit the pool. “I can do this,” says Mark out loud. “Hey, I’ve watched enough PBS television shows to know what I am doing. Let’s see, there’s “This Old House”, “Antiques Road Show”, “The...
The Bird in the Flue by Mark Lyons Image by flockine from Pixabay “Mark, there’s a bird in the flue,” said Sally as she walked into their tastefully decorated study/computer/media enclave/sock workroom. “I’ve got this covered!” exclaimed Mark jumping up out of his slightly broken desk chair which he found somewhere and brought home because he is so cheap, ……uh, …... frugal and thrifty. “What are you going to do?” asked Sally. “It’s a great plan!” said Mark with a big grin spreading across his face. He rushed past Sally on his way to the living room with an empty paper box and lid in his hands. “I’m going to humanely trap the bird in this...
The Thrill of the Ride! by Mark Lyons Image by Suzanne D. Williams from Pixabay Ah, the thrill of the ride! You’re wearing a comfortable pair of men’s argyle crew socks from SammySocks Etc. covered by a couple of black, ankle-high boots. A strong pair of jeans, a long sleeve shirt, a black leather jacket, a pair of leather gloves, and a helmet finish off the ensemble. The wind rushes past. With the helmet’s visor in the up position, tears form at the corners of each eye from the speed of the ride. The smell in the air is crisp and clear. Dew rests gently of the grass as you speed by. The great...
Speaking of Motorcycles by Mark Lyons Image by Salvatore Rubino from Pixabay “Schweetie, have I told you that I love you lately?” asked Mark. “Yes, you told me five minutes ago, Mark,” replied Sally. “Uh, Honey, have I told you how gorgeous you are recently?” asked Mark. “Ten minutes ago,” replied Sally. Several minutes of silence pass by. Mark and Sally are sitting in their car waiting at a red light in heavy traffic. “Cutie Pie, have I told you that you look really great in those pastel, low cut socks from SammySocks Etc.?” asked Mark. “Right before you told me how gorgeous I look,” said...
