by Mark Lyons
Image by InspiredImages from Pixabay
SammySocks Etc. Blog - Comments and Observations from Someone Who Is a Retired Educator and the Father of Sammy of SammySocks Etc.
“You are handsome. You are fit. You excel at everything you do. No one in this room is as smart or as successful as you.”
“That’s right! 100%! Keep going! Tell me more!” says Mark.
Sally walks into the room, looks around, and asks her husband, “Mark, who are you talking to?”
Mark is sprawled out on the floor with his head on a pillow and his shoes off revealing a bright orange pair of crew socks from SammySocks Etc. “Hi, Honey,” he says. “I am listening to this great self-help cassette tape I found when I was cleaning the closet. I think I got it back when I was going through my I-can-get-rich-listening-to-self-help-tapes-about-how-to-get-rich stage.”
“Yeah?” says Sally.
“I think I didn’t give the tapes enough time to work,” says Mark. “There’s some really good stuff here. It’s like they know me – really know me. Here listen.”
Mark pushes the play button on an ancient cassette player.
“You have the physique of Hershelcules.”
Mark quickly stops the tape and whispers to Sally. “I’m pretty sure that’s Hercules much older brother. But still – me.” Mark pushes the play button again.
“Your hair is thick, luxurious, and the envy of all most geriatric men and any man who has to, uh, who chooses to wear a toupee. You rock that baby blue leisure suit.”
Mark leans over and says to Sally, “It is a bit dated, but still so spot on!”
“Oh, Mark,” says Sally.